Soooo today was a crappy day. Really. There was crap all over the place, and as you can imagine, it smelled horrific... Ha just kidding. No, the hallways in my school were not lined with shit. I may have a screwed up mind, but I wouldn't write about that because it would get very boring very quickly. I could, however, talk about the horrible day I had...but I'm tired of reliving it. Instead, I'll talk about my best guy friend.
David is amazing. He's the most fun person I know!! Now, before I go on, you all have to know something. David and I are not now and never have crushed on each other. We're pretty damn close to best friends, is all. He has an amazing girlfriend that just moved to Florida over the summer. She actually flew back here to celebrate David's birthday with him and go to our school's homecoming with him. Isn't that awesome?? I thought it was amazing!! They're crazy about each other and I support them 110%.
Now that we have that out of the way, we can move on. David's girlfriend flew in on Thursday, so he only went to school half a day before he left with his mom to go pick up his woman at the airport. They ended up spending the weekend together and David also missed school today so he could take her to the airport and such. BUT he's going to be back at school tomorrow and I'm soo excited!! David makes me laugh, therefore he makes me happy. I like to be happy, so it makes sense that I like to be around David, does it not? Of course it does. And besides, the only other person that can really make me happy is going to be gone all week, so I'm missing out there...except maybe I'm not....
Perhaps being away from this person will help me to think clearer. Perhaps...I can resolve a few things for myself that way I'll know where I stand when I see this person again. But there's always the possibility that I will resolve nothing. And I'm thinking if that happens and I get stuck back at square one...then it may be possible that I'm not deluding myself into thinking I'm feeling more than I really am. In simpler terms (I think), I hope to decifer my feelings before this person gets back. If I still feel the same or I feel even more towards them, then I think it's safe to assume that there are no delusions where I am concerned. But if my feelings have all but vanished by then....well I guess I'm safe.
I expect this person's feelings to have disappeared, so in a way, I'm hoping for my feelings to do the same thing. It's hard to love someone that doesn't love you back. Sure, it's possible, but it hurts every moment of every day. I don't want to feel that anymore...or ever again...but I suppose that's just life, right? Besides....who says I even love him....? >.>
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